Awesome Beirut music video - I am so inspired by this

Can't Hardly See at All

I could honestly spend all day recording. When I start in the morning, I honestly can't stop. I forget to eat (which is very weird for me), I pay no attention to phone calls, emails, lines I need to memorize, songs I need to learn... I love layering tracks and building a very simple song that used to be just me and my guitar to include piano, tambourine, xylophone...etc. I'm so excited for my website to be updated so I can share my newest song with everyone!

I wrote this song, Can't Hardly See at All, last December when I went home for Christmas. My brother and I were standing outside in the snow on our parents' deck in Colorado. I had only lived in New York for a little over a year at this time and I was missing my brother sooo much. Our family dog had died a few months before (we had had her since I was in the fourth grade) and we were staring down at where she was buried under the tree in the yard. This was a moment I will never forget. That night I saw my little brother as an adult, a friend, and not so little anymore. The snow was coming down so hard and we went into the yard and just ran around in it, living completely in that moment. I realized we had both grown up but still had no idea where the future would take us. I did not want to go back to New York that weekend. I wanted to stay in that moment, in the yard, in the snow.

A year later now, and he is living just a mile from me in Brooklyn. We are meshing our musical styles together and playing open mics at Pete's Candy Store and Sidewalk Cafe....and seeing where that takes us!

My amazing husband has spent hours and hours updating my website and 'Can't Hardly see at All' will be on it within a few days.

For those of you interested in lyrics, here they are:

You pressed my hands so hard together that the snowball turned to ice
For a moment we were numb and the world it was still, the world it was finally still
We watched the grave under the tree, spirits are always free
At the time, mine was stuck inside of me

We watched our feet break underneath
And fall through the cracked pavement, where loose ends meet
So much for accuracy
In a hole they buried me

It was only a winter light
Finding it's way in
So close to the ground I got to know you
And you showed me what could have been
But we could hardly see
No, we can't hardly see at all

You just wanted to grow your hair long
So you did, and it grew and it grew
And I thought I wanted to be like that
New, new to everyone

We watched our feet break underneath
And fall through the cracked pavement, where loose ends meet
So much for accuracy
In a hole they buried me

What a daunting task!

So, first day of blogging. Hmmm, do I like this? Don't know yet.

I have re-written this first blog over and over...and deleted it over and over. It started as a post about the beginning of my theatre company but I couldn't stop deleting everything I was writing. This is harder than I thought it would be! What is the purpose of this post? Is it to talk about starting a theatre company, is to talk about the show we want to produce? Is it to talk about songwriting, websites, spaceships, snails, guitars, music, ice cream (mmm...half baked), the traffic on the BQE...There are so many directions I can go in. What if I post all of my ideas about the show I want to write and then someone steals them? Aaaahh!! All of a sudden I feel like I am back in college writing a 10 page paper that's due in an hour. My heart is beating fast and my shoulders are getting tight...and why can't I take a deep breath? Woah...relax... isn't one supposed to enjoy blogging?

So...I am getting up now and taking a walk around the apartment. Let's see what will pop into my head to write about next.

I know you are waiting in suspense.....This is what it was: I love dogs. Whenever you just need to get your mind off of something, you can play with them, or snuggle them, or talk to them. And they never talk back! So, in conclusion... here is a picture of my dog, Gracie....who should have been named Cubby. Or Clover.

More to come on the theatre company! Our name is SparrowTree and the website will be up soon! I am adapting Hansel and Gretel and starting to write the music to it. There! I said it. Now I have to do it!